We just came home from a 4 day vacation in Virginia Beach. Actually it was half vacation and half work since I had a handful of photography sessions during the weekend. I saw people that I haven't seen since high school. All extra 120 pounds of me. I felt like screaming I won't be fat foor too much longer. Or I'm going to require these same people to see me in a year and a half from now. lol Anyhow, when I walked into my Mom's house my Lola asked if I was pregnant. Nice. Why can't I get fat width ways instead of looking like I'm pregnant? I told my parents and Lola what I was planning on doing in May. They all seemed very supportive but you never know with them. Anyhow, on my last day while eating lunch with my Lola she pointed out that after I had surgery I will be pretty. I just said yes. I thought I was pretty now. I thought my Grandmother and mother would think I'm pretty now. I guess I was wrong. Part of me wants to defend them. After all I'm fat. But c'mon! Who says that to their granddaughter or children? I am pretty. I look in the mirror and I know that sometimes I look pretty. I guess not to my family.
Tomorrow is my first doctors appointment with Dr. Joseph Czerkawski. I'm very excited to start this six month process. I'm going to remind myself to stay positive and to be patience. I'm ahead of the game already.
I also opened a fortune cookie last night that said something like, "Keep you plans a secret for now." It's funny how my boys could have open that cookie. Or I could have thrown it away since it had been there for 5 days but I opened it and I felt like the message was directed to me.
No comments:
Post a Comment