5:30am freak out

It just hit me what I'm about to do. I'm in tears. I love myself. I love Sabrina 2.0. I don't want anyone to doubt that. The reasons behind this surgery is so hard to explain because I love who I am at this very moment. I just don't like 2 parts of it. Weird huh? I'm laying in bed crying and let the nerves and doubts wash away. I've got this. 

Before with a dress on

Sucking in...donde esta mi boobs?

Not sucking in and hanging forward...

Not sucking in 4 months pregnant

2 more weeks!

I'm at the 2 week mark. Surgery has been paid in full and now I'm just waiting. I'm hoping the next 2 weeks fly by because I can't think about anything else. I'm so scared it's not going to work. I know this is how I felt before gastric bypass and I'm being silly. I'm so focused on my tummy tuck. I'm borderline obsessed with looking at stories on realself.com The good and the bad and the in between. Is there anything I can do now to help? Did I lose enough weight? Blah blah blah. 2 more weeks!

I'm going to stop drinking beer from here until surgery. I don't want anything contributing to bloating and swelling. Beer is so bad for your body anyhow and especially now that I'm drinking IPAs. I need to go back to wine, mix drinks, or ultra light beer. I'm also going to try to eat extra clean between now and then. I want to do everything I can to make sure he can take away as much skin as possible.

Ahhh 2 more weeks.

Boob Preview!

Here is a preview of my new girls. On the second picture try to imagine a flatter stomach. These are 550cc Silicone implants. I will have somewhere between 500-550cc. Not too crazy right?

Around the corner

2 weeks and 2 days until my surgery day. Ahhhh! I'm super excited. Super nervous. Can't wait to have 3 weeks off of work. Should I post before and after pictures here? As PG13 as possible?

I bought my first bra the other day. A zip up sports bra high compression D cup :) Could come at a better time either. I own 2 bras currently. One strapless nude and one strapless black. The black is too big and 100 padding. The nude was chewed up a big by my dog but not enough to stop wearing it. Then 2 days ago he really got to it. It's basically holding on by a thread but I have to wear it! Stop judging me people. I couldn't justify buying a new bra 2 weeks before a boob job. It's kinda itchy though.....

Shopping. I caught myself off from going clothing shopping a few months ago. I didn't want to waste money on shirts and pants if I don't know what size I will be when I've recovered. Financially it's been a good move too. I feel like a crackhead though. There are so many cute clothes that I want right now! 

Like this romper from Victoria Secret and dress from Venus.com



I've also been thinking about bathing suit options. Will I be brave enough to wear a bikini? I'll tell you I'm honestly worried to. Not because I'm not confident enough but because of what other people will think. I don't want my sister in laws to think I think I'm the hot shit.  On the flip side of that I want to be able to wear the clothes that I haven't in so long and not hide myself because of other people. I don't know why I'm worried about them because they've been nothing but supportive through the last 2 years.



What do you think about these 2 bikinis?  Wide enough bands on the bottom to hide my scar and enough coverage on the top to not embarrass the shit out of my son. Thoughts?

I went for my last visit with the surgeon two weeks ago. I was feeling very nervous about the size of the breast and if a tummy tuck would really work. I had this bad feeling that I was going to have monsterous size boobs and still a chubby belly. I felt better after talking to him. I'm still nervous especially but I have hope too. I couldn't have even imagined my body would look like it does now 2 years ago and I'm happy with it. Hopefully I will have the same feeling about my tummy tuck and implants in a few months!

Surgery is scheduled for May 21st at 7:30am. Please keep us in your prayers and toes/fingers crossed for us!