Honesty

This blog won't help me if I'm not honest with it. There's no therapy to my thought process if I'm holding it in. I've never held anything back from this blog so much so it's gotten me in trouble at times but I have for the past 2 weeks. I've posted the good and not the bad and it's because of the accountability and the shame. So here is its. I haven't ran outside or on the elliptical since Jan 7th. I've still been doing yoga but I've fallen off the wagon for my 15K training program and it hit me last night that I'm failing. It has become so hard to do it without a partner. Chrissy is out. Whenever she starts running again she will be starting the process over from sqaure one and Nate doesn't like to run and even though he says, "Oh, I will run with you." He's not pushing me.  He's not making me get out of bed to run. Or he's offered to ride his bike next to me. How awkward would that be? This will be a challenge for me. If I have no one here to push me I have to be the strong one. I have to push myself. After all this is my goal not anyone elses.  Chrissy said I could use her treadmill tonight so no excuse of not running in the dark by myself or it being too cold. I have to do this.