Update

I started taking Clomid on day 3 of my cycle. Clomid is suppose to help make me ovulate. For some reason since December I haven't been ovulating. I think it is just the stress of everything going on. The doctor said the antibiotic should have helped Nate's infertile results but he is going to be retested to make sure. I am praying that it did work and we will be moving in the right direction very soon.

This baby thing and the inability to produce one has really taken a toll on me. I get mad and sad and angry. When we decided to try almost a year ago I thought I would be pregnant by now. I thought we would be planning our last family cruise before our new addition. I never thought we would have these issues. I know there are other options. But I didn't want to have just any baby...I wanted to have Nate's baby..our baby and I never thought it might not be an option.

It seems like everyone else is getting pregnant all around me. I am green with envy. When I see people babies or pregnant women with their husbands hands guiding them around...beaming with pride..I want to scream, "It's not fair!"

All I can try to do is stay calm. That stressing out about it and getting upset isn't good for the cause and it isn't good for my marriage either. God will watch over Nate, Ethan, & I. Our time will come.