Quick update!

Can you believe that I'm less than 1 week away from my surgery anniversary?!?  I can't believe it's been 1 year already. Time is flying by.

I've had a very busy 2 weeks. I went to our annual seminar in St. Pete last week.  This is the first time I've seen everyone since October.  I was around 200 pounds in Ft Lauderdale and in a large and XL pant. I'm now 149 and in a size 8 pant and S/M shirt. The dark hair also threw people off. Every time someone said something to me I would reply, "Oh, it's the hair." ;) Overall it went well. I told one lady who kept asking me and telling me I was her inspiration. I felt like I was misleading her if I didn't tell her about my surgery.  A few people didn't recognize me and even the president of one company told me all night at dinner that it was a pleasure to meet me. Um, I've had dinner with him twice before. I felt great. I bought some new dresses at Steinmart and spent a small fortune ($200) but it was worth it. I felt put together. I felt professional. It was a good trip. I'm glad to have that over with and now they all know what Sabrina 2.0 looks like.

A new thing. My husband loves me. He knows I love him but for some reason he is scared to death that I'm going to leave him. And it isn't just because I'm skinny he's always had this fear that our forever would end. And no matter what I tell him he always says, "You better not leave me." Every blue moon. During this business trip we stayed very busy and I didn't get to talk to him as often as I would have. The very last night I spoke to him around 4ish and went to the rest of the seminar, followed by the cocktail hour, followed by dinner, and then drinks with some colleagues. I didnt' get home until 1:30am and I didn't have my phone on me. I put it in my purse at dinner and didnt' pull it back out until I got back into my room. I had missed 3 calls from him and a message saying he wasn't happy with me. I called him when I got into bed and spoke to him and then called him again that next morning. He said he wasn't happy but he was okay and just had a bad feeling. That I was smokin' hot and didn't want someone to take me. He told me he went as far to check my cellphone text messages and noticed that I had messaged 3 out of state numbers and the times of those messages. Of course it's nothing juicy and I told him who they were and why.  We didn't argue about it we just talked. I told him that I felt like crying because I felt hurt. That the whole situation felt weird. Like he didn't trust me. I've put 9 years into this relationship and have been honest to a fault with him and never once cheated on him. Then in a weird way it felt good too. It felt good to know he loves me that much and thinks I'm that pretty that someone would snatch me up like that. So we talked it out and everything is okay. I understand where he's coming from. I'm flattered but I also don't want him to think I would every do anything to risk our marriage.

VA: This weekend I also went home to visit my family.  I haven't been home in a year and I was excited to see everyone again. Well you know what I mean. Most. lol When asked how the trip was the best I can explain is they are who they are. If I expect any less or more I would be disappointed. I've learned from years of arguing and tears to just accept them for who they are.  Especially my parents and I'm okay with that.

My niece was just as expected. Adorable as ever and Lorelei could have eaten her with a spoon. It was nice to see Katherine and David as parents.  They are both wonderful with their daughter and you can see the love they have for her runs over.  I did get a few "first time parent" giggles from them but every first time parent goes through that. I can't help that I'm an old ass lady with a 12 year old son. I enjoyed seeing Christina. I wish I could have spent more time with her. She's such a smart girl with a good head on her shoulders. She reminds me a lot of Charlyn. Christopher wasn't able to make it and him & Charlyn were missed. I didn't get to spend a lot of time with Caroline and I wish I could. That girl really pulls and erks me at the same time. I just don't think she knows who she is and the way people treat her really pulls at my heart string. I feel so bad for her that she is dealing with my father all on her own. I hate that she isn't an honest person but she is very much her father's daughter. When I hear him or others judge her it makes me giggle because she is a younger version of him. He isn't honest. He will twist a story to get people upset. But again it is who he is and I just ignore it. With her though it's hard to ignore. I want so much more for her. I want her to like herself and be proud of herself. I want her to be successful. I wish she felt like she could trust one of us to be 100% honest with us. It's strange but I realized this week that she is actually closer to my son's age than she is to mine. Isn't that a bit weird?  No wonder why her and Ethan get along more and relate a little bit better. Ethan really likes her and she is a very good aunt to him. Which I of course like and appreciate.

So what did they all think about my weight loss. I think my mom likes it a lot. She kept looking at me and laughing and saying how skinny I was. We laughed at my onesie. We laughed at my little boobs. She seems really happy about my current weight. I noticed her at one time looking at the side by side of me and her that charlyn made and she said, "Oh, I really like this picture."  She also showed me the outfits she thought I would look good at and when I showed her my belly she said that it wasn't bad at all so I could wear more. She brougth me some tank tops that we too small for her now so I could wear them during the summer and she said she would take them back when she loses more weight. lol Carol told me she didn't want me to lose anymore weight and that she loved me just as much now as she did when I was heavy.  What do you expect it's Carol. Always so sweet. My Dad said, "Oh you have lost a big of weight haven't you." Um yeah I would say so. That's all he said though.  Caroline told me how she is working out too and in between sizes just like me too. Christina told me I looked good and was skinny. Katherine didn't say anthing! lol I think she has read my blog too much and was worried that whatever was said would end up on the blog! LMAO I know it's hard for Katherine to bite her tongue so I really appreciated the effort she made. But I do want her to know that it's okay to say stuff. I have a thick skin and I know her thoughts or jokes are coming from a good place. Dave and her did ask a couple questions or maybe it was just was Dave and mom but she was present when I answered them.

Soooo. that's my quick wrap up. It was a great trip. We did a lot in a little time. I hate that. I wish I had more time up there. I need to plan another trip where we spend a week up there and just pretend to be tourist again. In 3 weeks is our first Grayson girl camping trip. I'm looking forward to it. It's going to be a great time hanging out with my sisters and Dad.  Oh, by the way Lynn was very nice too. That's the most time I've spent with her and she's actually kinda funny.